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03:24 am: it's hard to write innit?
writing to me is a passive physical activity. my mind races too fast for my fingers to catch up and thus for me to write requires patience. sometimes that patience transforms into laziness and it is not good. then i write nothing at all. i may have an idea i am excited about, but because i am excited of it i then realize i will bore quickly of it or "lose" it while writing. this kinda worries me.  i've thought about "recording myself telling the stories and then writing them but i think the same principle would apply. sigh. i've also thought about writing lyrics. silly lyrics at first i think. silly rhymes. children's books style. also, i've just turned on the tv and i'm seeing this "new" woman artist on vh1....what is it about women playing the piano that turn me on so much? i remember the only "bad" thoughts i ever had about a certain teacher back in my youthful days came only when she played the piano. is it the pretty hands thing? that they bow their heads and their hair hangs downs and looks pretty?is it that they usually close their eyes but peek every once in a while in coquetish way to look at the music? the name of the lady was sarah b. it wasn't half bad. the song was called "love song". of course. so anyway, writing. i need to write two full length sci fi or fantasy short stories this month. i want to try. i really want to try. my actual goal is to "sketch" at least 5 stories. it's hard. writing sci fi is tough because i can't wing it. it is a premeditated form of writing (due to the sci aspect of it). i have to plan the place. the workings of it, the politics, the culture, is it far of futuristic or 5 years ahead? can we go to space yet or not? is there a new way to travel? how does it change the life that we now have? why is it sci-fi? how do people interact? maybe we have eliminated all verbal communication? how about computers? will we even regard them as a foreign object? and then i have to take all these things and explain them fast, one because they cannot under any circumstance mask the story, and two because a short story is well...short. so yea peeps. anything you'd like to see in the future? i had planned to write tonight. but i went outside. i kinda did not want to, but i had said since last night that i would so...compromises compromises!
i think about stories. but all i get are cliches, or what i think are cliches. like the first trip to a asteroidal colony (the story i tried before), or a man who suddenly goes to the past (how he does it it unclear yet), a woman who is a sought after goddess with a penchant for thievery and sexing comedians, a dude that dies and goes to the after life and is forced to decide which "heaven" to attend, a person that after a séance gone wrong finds that everything that he wishes to happen happen but not exactly..actually what happens is the opposite of what he thinks, so he spends the whole time trying to keep all his thoughts, every single one, under control but of course fails miserably with funny/catastrophic consequences....and more of the same trite and retarded-you-watched-too-much-anime ideas. so....yea. let's hope i write a story tomorrow that has nothing to do at all with what i wrote above. 

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